As the rain falls
by SpaggyB
Summary: A sad!stuck one shot of GamKar. Their final conversation.


"Karkat. Could a motherfucker get your undivided motherfucking attention for just a minute? There's something a bro needs to all up and say to another motherfucking bro, you know?"

"Oh Gogdamn fucking fuck, again? What is this the billionth fucking time you've had to fucking confess to me that you're getting Gogdamn fucking bored on this rock or what the fuck ever? Are you gonna fucking flip your shit so hard the rest of us won't even fucking need a fucking club to the head, or a shitty spear to the heart to fucking die a horrible shitty fucking death like the rest of everyone? "

"Nah bro, not this motherfucking time. Just, follow a motherfucker outside would you?"

"Oh al-fucking-right, but this better be some fucking quality shoosh-papping or Ill throw you off this piece of shit meteor."

Karkat swung his legs off the arm off the recliner he was lazing in and planted his feet on the ground, his brow creased in his trademark scowl. He knew he was Gamzee's Moirail and all, but lately he'd been so needy Karkat never felt he had any time to himself, a thought that once again crossed his thinkpan as he followed the larger troll through the corridors and out on to the poorly constructed structure the humans referred to as a "porch." Honestly, the need for such an obviously ridiculous… _thing_ was something Karkat could just not comprehend. The children claimed they built it so they could sit outside during the unexplainable rain that somehow graced the seemingly uninhabitable rock hurtling through space. The troll hadn't come up with a reasonable retort to that however, so he kept his illogical hatred for the thing inside his head.

"Oof!"

He was pulled off his train of thought when his face smacked into Gamzees solid chest. Turns out the clown had stopped walking and turned around to the face the smaller troll, and was now staring down at him, an oddly blank look to his usually mischievous eyes. Karkats brow furrowed deeper, and he pushed out his bottom lip in a pout that made him look like a wriggler who couldn't move a stone. An awkward moment of silence passed between them as he waited for his friend to speak, but his patience quickly wore out.

"Look, Gamzee, we're out-fucking-side what the fuck did you want to say to me _bro_?" He crossed his arms over his chest and scowled up at the larger troll, craning his neck to get his face within eye sight. Even though Gamzee was abnormally tall for their species, Karkat was also quite short, and this combined meant Karkat barely cleared Gamzees shoulder. Eventually, he just took a few steps backwards. His neck was starting to cramp.

"Gamzee?" he waved an ashen hand in front of the clowns face, annoyance flaring within him. What the fuck was this basket case playing at?

"Meteor to Gamzee, come in Gamzee! Fucking say something you asshat!" He shook Gamzee by the shoulders, causing his arms to swing lifelessly at his sides, his dead look staring a hole into the space somewhere behind Karkats right shoulder. Ok, now this was getting kind of weird. Gamzee had never acted this way around Karkat before, and the smaller Cancer was starting to get a little worried. He lightly slapped the palm of his hand against the clowns painted face.

"Gamzee, seriously, talk to me." His voice softened, the crease between his eyes easing up into a wide-eyed look of concern. "Im your Gogdamn Moirail man, you can fucking talk to me. What the fuck is going on with you? Hellooo? HELLO?! GAMZEE FUCKING TALK TO ME YOU FUCKING MUTE PIECE OF –"

"You're not my Moirail."

The rain fell above them, the heavy drops of water drumming a pattern into the corrugated iron roof, but all Karkat heard was an empty ringing in his ears. Time had stopped. Karkat was frozen in place, one hand clutching Gamzees shoulder, the other thrust out in thin air, inches from the tall clowns face. His eyes were wide and staring, mouth hanging slightly ajar as he failed to comprehend what his best friend had said. He blinked slowly, think pan racing trying to piece together the taller trolls words, but he was only coming up blank.

An immeasurable moment passed before Gamzee, his features so rigid it was like he was carved out of stone, gave his body a harsh shake, causing Karkats limbs to fall to his sides. Karkats whisper was almost inaudible.

"Wh-what did you say?"

Gamzees response was low, his eyes, void of emotion, staring straight into Karkats.

"I said, you. Are not. My. Moirail."

It felt like the wind had been punched out of him. Karkat dropped Gamzees gaze, his bottom lip quivering uncontrollably as his eyes darted around at their feet, as if he were searching for something to pull him back into the reality he had clearly just thrown himself out of. Not Gamzees Moirail? That was ludicrous, ludicrous! He and Gamzee were the best of bros, they had been there for one another through thick and thin, there was no way anything would come between them.

"Wh-what the fuck do you mean, Gamzee?" his voice shook as his eyes latched on to Gamzees right foot, his gaze so intense it wouldn't have surprised him him the shoe suddenly caught fire. "Of.. of course I'm you're fucking Moirail, I mean… you're mine right? We're bros, that's… that's how this shit works.. right?"

"We _were_ Moirails, Karkat." Karkat held his breath while Gamzee spoke, every muscle in his body tensed to snapping point. "But we aren't any more. This shit needs to all up and motherfucking stop."

Gamzee snapped Karkat out of his trance when he moved his foot away, stepping over to the shoddy railing to gaze out over the drenched rock. Karkats neck snapped up to watch the clown move, unable to understand what he was hearing. A moment passed before he heard Gamzee sigh and turn back to face him, leaning casually against the rail, staring blankly in his direction. Karkat swallowed dryly before forcing himself to speak.

"Wh-why does it need to… to stop, Gamzee?" He shifted his weight uncomfortably, his think pan racing with ideas to try and stop this from happening. "I mean… we're bros… I mean…"

His neck snapped up as his thinkpan came to rest on one particular memory. He took three quick steps towards the clown, his shaking hands involuntarily clasping at Gamzees wrists.

"Remember when this started? Huh? Right here, right fucking here on this Gogforsaken meteor!" he could feel his eyes rolling around wildly in his head, searching the other trolls face for some kind of reaction. "You went all psycho on us, killed a bunch of us, and then I came and I saved you remember? I calmed you down, when everyone else wanted to kill you, I knew there was still a chance.. I…"

Gamzee's eyes flashed, his painted nostrils flaring at the memory. But before Karkat could fully register the reaction, he had shaken his wrists free and pushed himself off the rail, causing Karkat to stumble backwards.

"Of course I motherfucking remember." Gamzee leaned his elbows on the rail, once again looking out into the rain, his blank expression mirroring the dreary surroundings caused by the falling water. "No other motherfucker could have all up and motherfucking brought me back from that. But I've been doing some motherfucking thinking bro, up in here." He tapped his finger lightly against his temple, "and that's the motherfucking problem."

Karkat had managed to drag his way over to Gamzee, and was standing at the rail next to him, eyes locked on the trolls face, mouth hanging open as he hung on every word. The world around them had faded to nothing, and all he could see was the clown. Even the rain had become a dull drone at the back of his thinkpan.

Gamzee lazily trailed a hand out in front of him, his fingers swirling hypnotically in the falling rain. Within seconds, his arm up to his elbow was dripping wet, leaving light trails over his ashen skin. A few minutes passed before he continued.

"Karkat, have I told you about motherfucking miracles?"

Karkat swallowed and tried to choke out an answer, vigorously nodding his head at the same time. In the past, he had always scolded and mocked the clown for talking so adamantly about his shitty idea of divine intervention, but now, he would give anything for his friend to continue talking about them forever. As long as he was by his side.

"Well, what I was all up and going through that motherfucking day my friend, that was a motherfucking miracle. That was the un-fucking-leashing of my true motherfucking potential. My destiny. See, everything in this motherfucking game, its all motherfucking connected." He turned his hand in slow circles in front of him, mesmerised by the sight. " I'm connected, you're connected, we're all motherfucking connected to each other, and to every motherfucking thing around us. When I all up and lost my motherfucking thinkpan, and went on that crazy-ass killing spree, I was able to motherfucking see what was up. I saw the things I was all up and closely motherfucking connected to. I saw my destiny."

Karkat jumped as Gamzee suddenly dropped his hand, turning sharply to face the quivering troll, contempt blazing from his eyes. The Cancer felt himself shrink away from the gaze he never once shied away from before, unable to recognise his friend in those eyes. The next words out of Gamzees mouth shattered Karkat into a million pieces.

"And my motherfucking destiny is not you."

Before Karkat knew what was happening, Gamzee had turned swiftly on his heel and was striding away from the porch, out into the rain. As if in a dream, Karkat followed, stumbling clumsily down the shallow steps, getting instantly drenched as he ran after his ex-Moirail, shimmering through the downpour in the distance. How was he moving so fast? Where was he going? What was going on?

"GAMZEE!" Karkat choked out a desperate cry as Gamzees figure slowly faded into the horizon. "GAMZEE WAIT, PLEASE, DON'T LEAVE!" He stretched out an arm in front of him, clutching desperately at the empty air in front of him. "I NEED YOU! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME! I NEED YOU! GAMZEE!"

But it was no use. Within seconds, the rain had consumed the clown, and all Karkat could see was the shimmering grey around him in every direction. Even the porch, despite only being a few meters away, was hardly visible. Gamzee was gone.

"Gam…zee…"

His knees hit the sodden ground first, then his hands, fingers splayed out in the mud as droplets from his soaked hair fell around them. The heavy rain pounded on his back, but he hardly felt it. All he could feel was the cold, cold emptiness that engulfed him. Not like the cold from the rain that soaked through his clothes and ran in rivulets over his shivering skin, but the cold that came from knowing his closest friend had abandoned him. Abandoned him.

For as long as they had been on this meteor, he and Gamzee had been close. The closest they had ever been. Through everything, from Karkats pain at Dave and Terezie's redrom, to the time Gamzee had almost gone on another killing spree, they had always been there to comfort and console each other. Now Gamzee was gone, and Karkat was…

"Alone…"

* * *

**im sorry! im sorry i had to write to vent all of my feels about the recent Gam/Kar upd8. I didnt realise how hard I shipped these two until they split... IM SO SAD YOU GUYS! D: D: D:**

**Homestuck and its characters belong to Andrew Hussie**


End file.
